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21 October 2013

Cheers!

The following story was told me by Tumble back in the 1970s on the evening of the day it occurred. He remembers it well for he narrated it in Mangla again some years ago

Year 1974, Tumble (Javed Alam Khan), the youngest of the Alam Khan brothers, was a captain with 24 Cavalry and Brigadier Zahir Alam, the eldest, was commanding a brigade in the same division, that is, 6 Armoured Division in Kharian. Tumble narrates that he was over for lunch with his brother and they are sitting down with the lady of the house eating when she narrated.

She had earlier that day been at the CMH for a urine analysis. There she met up with three other young army wives who were there for the same purpose. So they sat in the Ladies Waiting Room to be called in by the laboratory man. Now, for some peculiar reason, the way to the officers’ toilet was through the ladies’ waiting room. (It is no longer that way now).

Mrs ZAK narrated that a young armoured corps lieutenant in a black overall (that’s how she knew he was AC) walked in and regarded the three women holding out their beakers full of yellow piss. ‘Cheers!’ said the man before walking away to the loo.

When ZA heard the tale, he actually fell off the chair laughing.

PS. The next day, ZA asked all armoured corps officers who had exhibited that fine example of wit. Now, the Alam Khan brothers are no ordinary men. They are all good people, the typical public school types. ZA wanted to commend the youngster for his ready humour. No one owned up. Not one lieutenant stood up. What made me very sad when Tumble narrated the episode back then was that the youngster did not know his commander. He did not know one of the best men and one of the greatest officers the army had produced.

Related: Living with one of those Alam brothers

18 comments:

  1. Zkk Khattak

    Excellent. I am sure it is true. Gen Tumble bet his month's pay over something in a GSP with a Captain (Ali Ejaz Rafi) and asked him to show him the book the next day. Gen Tumble lost and sent him the Cheque on the first of the following month.


    Waris Kamal

    I had the honor of knowing them all, less shamim alam , right upto the last one in army . And u bet there is a whole book of jokes like that

    Zuha Saeed

    I had d pleasure of being gen shamim's G-3 at d CGS sectt,and then his ADC wen he ws d CJCSC..knew all d brothers less d 2 shaheeds..d pers who deserves d real tribute ws their MOTHER who trained them to be wat they eventually became..ALL wer icons in their fields..

    Shafqat Chatha

    ZA was my commander in kharian those days kamal.i fully agree with ur remarks.i some times ponder as to where all such like people have gone....??and there were many many more like this those days....like brig javed(micham)...rafi alam.....long list.

    Yawar Habib

    GENERAL JAVED ALAM KHAN, GREATEST GENERAL PRODUCED BY THE ARMY.

    Rauf Ahmed Khan

    It was a pleasure to serve under (late FA) Feroze Alam during the '71 war. May ALLAH bless his brave n noble soul, ameen.

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  2. Gentlemen, the Alam Khan brothers were/are all good people. To know them was an honour. To be friends with even one a greater honour and boundless pleasure.

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  3. I had the pleasure of knowing the Alam brood, and the proud privilege of serving alongside some of them; one seldom comes across a finer band of soldiers & human beings! It has been an honour to count them amongst my role models & friends; thank you for making my life richer!!

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  4. Omar Chaudhry, many of us were fortunate to know this merry band. The tragedy is so many will not know them and be able to emulate them.

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  5. I thought you will never loosen up. Good to get out of deep and thick history once in a while. Loved this. .

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  6. Had the honour of serving with Gen Javed Alam in C&SC in 89/90, I was DQ and he was a DS....never demanding...always forthcoming to help us young officers. Had a unique way of telling Jokes....serious faced! God bless him

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  7. Anonymous, I am human, after all, aren't I? I've got other racier jokes. All unprintable, though.

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  8. Arshad Ansari, You have been a fortunate man. Cheers!

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  9. Why was Javed Alam Khan called Tumble? Any story behind it?

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  10. By JAK's own account, he, Ejaz (13 Lancers, died Bara Pind Dec '71) and, I think, Shuaib (PAF) were at the same time at Lawrence College. Their fav food was egg rumble-tumble. They overdid it so much that they came to be known as Tumbles, all three of them. Legend has it that even they themselves greeted each other 'Hi Tumble,' 'Hi Tumble.' As they say, 'Darogh ba gardan e Ravi.'

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  11. Humour seems to have gone out of uniform. Good old days.

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  12. Since the order of March was Zahir, Feroz, Shoaib, Shamim, Shamoon, Aftab, Mushtaq, Ejaz & Javed, the three brothers together at GG most probably were the three youngest - Mushtaq (PAF, killed in an F-6 accident in '67), Ejaz (13L, Shaheed in the '71 war) & Javed. Their nickname may also be reflective of their somewhat rotund facial shape (please note that I have made no comment on JAK's impressive physique)!!

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  13. Myself and Brig Saad has the honor of costing one month's pay in 1974 on our joining the SPEARHEADS. Tumble still remembers that and now he owes me BLUE..........................

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  14. Omar Chaudhry, for the correct order of march, pl refer to Brig ZA's "The Way it Was". My mistake: it would have been Aftab, not Shuaib.But we could always refer to Tumble for the last word.

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  15. Khak main keya sooratain hon gee jo pinhan ho gaeen.

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  16. Anonymous, so true Mirza Ghalib. When I finished reading The Way it Was (Brig ZAK) in 2005, I inscribed this full couplet on the last page.

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  17. Aap ke blog se mutasser ho ker, i have written an article in Uru. if you go me your email address i can send it to you.Sabuha Khan (mrs shuaib Alam)

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